Ready reader one, and two

Ready reader one, and two.

That moment when someone who you care about– really, really care about– reads your work for the first time….   It’s one part terrifying, two parts very soothing.

There is this sandwich of women who hold me together in my family.   It’s simple– On one end is my mother, and on the other end is my daughter(s).  I’m between the two somewhere, bouncing between still wanting to impress and please, and wanting to lead as an example.  This past week I had my mother and my older daughter read my story for the first time.  I think I was the most nervous having my daughter sit down and read it.   I held my breath a bit– worried that she might find it boring/confusing/weird… but then on about the fifth page she looked at me and said,

“Wait.  Where did you get all these words?”.   I was very confused… and then realized that while she has watched me work on my illustrations for this book over the past year, she has never seen me write any of it.

“Umm, I wrote the words, sweetheart”.

“You did?  Your WROTE the story???  WOW!”

“Do you like it?”

“I LOVE it.”

My heart filled up with birds and honey.   Kids sometimes know just the right thing to say.  Really, they do.   And watching her read it I realized truly for the first time that no matter what happens with this book, I have really been writing it for her this entire time.   If the rest of the world ends up wanting to read it, then that is sort of secondary.

Having my mother read it gave me a different sort of encouragement; An adult encouragement that comes with good advice about layout, character names, and further discussion about how the illustrations could better be married to the text.   Also, it’s just nice to have your mother beside you to hold your emotional hand a bit.  Sometimes you just need that person who has known you forever to remind you that following your dreams isn’t hogwash.

So– update– The Dummy is nearly complete.  I know what I need to do to finalize the text and sketches, but for some reason making myself actually sit down and get through this final stage has been really hard; my own excitement and impatience to see it done is driving me crazy.  As Willie Wonka says “the suspense is terrible.  I hope it’ll last”.